Q: What is some advice you can give to someone going through difficult times?
A: For most of us, there are times in life that are so sweet. Living on this earth seems like such a blessing and privilege, and we are so grateful for those special moments. Then there are those times that are difficult. As M. Scott Peck wrote in his bestselling book, The Road Less Traveled, “Life is difficult.” No human being can escape the pain endured in this life.
There are those times when you have suffered a major loss, your faith is tested, nothing seems to make any sense, and you can’t wrap your head around the pain. That’s when it’s most challenging to believe in anything anymore. Most of us go through difficult times, some more than others.
One thing is for sure: As long as we’re alive, and are constantly changing, I am reminded daily that change includes a death and rebirth. As long as the earth continues to move, change will appear, and remember that it will come in the form of loss throughout our lives. Since life includes a series of painful goodbyes, and we know they are never easy, there is a rebirthing process.
We learn to grieve, heal, and release the old, then embrace the change and welcome the new. As you make the shift through difficult times, know that there is a reason for this. Life is about lessons. As painful as they can be, we are all here to learn.
Difficult times are opportunities to open up new doors to your inner world that you may be prone to keeping shut. There is a time and a place for this to happen. We don’t always understand why when we experience these difficult times. However, when we’re forced to experience what is really happening, we also experience profound growth. As much as it hurt, that illness, deceit, tragedy, divorce, betrayal, abandonment, etc., was one of the best things that may have happened. These “difficult times” are what teach us the most.
Do not judge yourself for how you endure your suffering. There is no good, bad, right, or wrong way to go through the experience. In time, know you will unwrap the gift that lies within. Move through it, and on the other side a new sense of strength and wisdom will be waiting.
Something I learned over the years was to surrender my pain and not resist it. You may know the saying, “You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
If we can learn to bless the painful moments in our lives, remember somewhere therein lies the gift.