Q: I’m in counseling working on removing shame that I grew up with. I still feel some shame that goes way back to my early years. Do you have some suggestions to help me as well?

A: Shame vs. autonomy is our second developmental stage of life according to the late psychologist, Erik Erickson. By the age of two, we develop a healthy autonomous state and successfully move ontothe next stage of development, or we remain stuck in shame because we feel that we are bad, unworthy and inadequate. Many adults have not worked through this stage and remain stuck which only debilitates growth.

Know that you have done nothing wrong. You have not failed no matter who was responsible for you feeling that way at such a young age. You’ve only produced results. All of this has taken you to a higher place of growth in your life where you are learning to return to wholeness and balance, which was how you were born, yes, whole.

You are continuing to generate the energy you need to help you get to this higher place in your life. The fact that you are seeking some counseling and you have written to me for additional suggestions is revealing in a positive direction.

It’s important that you remove all shame and love yourself now for exactly who you are here and now. What happened to you back at the ripe young age of two that is wrapped in shame no longer serves you. Begin from this moment on to live and treat yourself from a new knowing, this is between you and your higher self.

From this beautiful and Divine space, ask for guidance to keep you on thispath to wholeness, the you who has always been there. This is your special space of knowing directly from your heart center. Own it and feel the empowerment of shifting to this beautiful space. You will be certain to obtain what you want and desire rather than what you don’t want.